Jared Akers

How to Be Happy

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Join Jared and Emily Akers as they talk about life, love, happiness, and respect for oneself and our partners in life. They explore many topics from life, love,
relationships, self-respect, travel, and keys to living a happy life; all from personal experience. Through Jared’s personal blog - How to Be Happy: Happiness for the Practical Mind - they receive questions about living a happy life from people all over the world. Through sharing their personal experience they humbly demonstrate how self-respect, authenticity, and love are vital components of living a happy life regardless of circumstances.

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HTBH 011: Happiness and Awareness

by Jared Akers

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awarenessIn order to find true inner-peace and happiness, we first need to have some awareness. This awareness is composed of two parts: 1) the awareness that something needs to change and 2) awareness of your thoughts and inner-dialog.

Early in my life I achieved my childhood dream of becoming a zookeeper and had the awareness that life was going to be an endless journey of unmet desires.

Being aware that there is a problem is the first step to making a change. [Read more…]

HTBH 010: You Are Not Your Relationships

by Jared Akers

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breakupEmily and I discuss the concept that you are not your relationships. We had a listener leave a heartfelt message on our podcast line about a recent breakup.

To set this up, Dr. Dyer in his book Your Sacred Self: Making the Decision to Be Free, he discusses the idea of the ego and spirit living in the mother’s womb.  How spirit knows there’s something greater out there. And that we (in physical form) come from no-where to now-here but then return to no-where.

You are not your relationships. Certainly the love energy between you and all of those in your immediate circle is very significant, but it is not who you are.  You are an individual soul that is connected to the whole, but you are not the relationship to that whole.  Your identification with your relationship provides you with great frustration because every time there is a glitch in it, as there always will be, you find yourself feeling worthless.  Remember that you are eternal, that which is changeless. You are in a great number of relationships, all of which have validity, but they come and go just like your life here in form comes from no-where and goes to now-here and then back to no-where. It is a relationship of coming and going, and thus it changes.

There’s a difference in not knowing what to do, or not wanting to accept something. And accepting something does not mean we have to like it.

Often we seek acceptance rather than Love, more precisely love for self.

How to make a move when you don’t know what to do? Sometimes doing nothing is the best thing to do; which in itself is doing something.

Even if we find ourselves hurt in a relationship, be grateful that we’re able hurt at all.

Every negative (seemingly) circumstance, relationship, or event in our lives is here to teach us a lesson. Learning and passing these tests, gives us the positive energy to transcend these difficult circumstances and come out better (more spiritually fit and emotionally mature).

It’s unfair to expect your partner in life to be there for everything. Certainly they’re there to support us when it matters, but also realize they are individuals and have lives as well. It’s important to have others we can lean on for support.

We’re all connected.

Topics in this episode:

  • Your Sacred Self: Making the Decision to Be Free, Wayne W. Dyer
  • Expectations

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HTBH 009: Happiness and Aging

by Jared Akers

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how to be happy agingAging is just a hard fact of life. Inescapable. In this episode of the How to Be Happy Podcast, Emily and I sit down to discuss our outlook on aging. We share our experience on resisting aging and how to accept it gracefully.

One important aspect of finding happiness in aging is acceptance. A major part of that acceptance is finding gratitude for the person we have become. And finding a way to use our life experiences to make us better and ultimately to help others.

With age, also (hopefully) we learn what’s really important in life. That life is about learning, not winning.

We discuss a little bit about the physical aspects of aging. How exercising (being able to run, swim, and compete in triathlons) is my way of reminding myself that I’m not dead yet.

Emily suggests that there’s no real work involved in aging… “Just keep waking up.” I have to admit when I was listening back to this episode I laughed out loud at that one.

Gravity plays a large part in aging.

With aging also comes the acceptance of death, and finding ways to cherish life more and realize we’re just lucky to be here.

We discuss a little bit about how we micromanage each other, and having motives in getting our partner to take over and do something for us when we don’t actually want to do it.

Some topics mentioned in this episode:

  • Patricia Briggs
  • True Blood

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HTBH 008: Happiness and Change

by Jared Akers

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happiness and changeEmily experienced a change recently at work and we sat down to discuss how to be happy in times of change. We discuss the challenges when dealing with change and how it’s up to us to make any change positive. Even when change is thrust upon us, and we seemingly have no choice, we can still embrace change and let it take us to where we’re supposed to be.

Life is simply easier when we learn how to not resist change. Sometimes in life, as in swimming, you need to just take a break and float on your back.

We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
– Joseph Campbell

Some topics mentioned in this episode:

  • Who Moved My Cheese?: An Amazing Way to Deal with Change in Your Work and in Your Life.
  • How to Be Happy Managing Expectations (episode 005)
  • Total Immersion Swimming: Perpetual Motion Freestyle in Ten Lessons

 

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HTBH 007: Relationships, Effective Communication and Control Issues

by Jared Akers

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how to be happy podcastEffective communication is vital in relationships. But how do control issues play into communication?  We discuss the importance of getting to our root emotions and how they play into effective communication and control.

Emily shares an experience with a friend and how her (friends) emotions were making it hard to communicate with another.  Specifically, instead of trying to control the situation by giving advice, try sharing our emotions and/or fears.

People change when they want to and more effective when it’s their idea. It’s better to lead by example, attraction rather than promotion.

I share my confusion about artificial flavors and blowing my own mind. [Read more…]

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About Me

Jared & Emily Akers Hello, I'm Jared Akers. And that lovely lady next to me, that's my wife Emily. This photo was taken in 2009 while on the island of Curacao SCUBA diving. We're happy, and want you to be happy too.

Learn more about me.

Recent Posts

  • 31 Quotes About Love to Ignite Your Relationship
  • The Pain and Joy of Discovering Who You Are (and are not)
  • 5 Tips on How to Stay Positive no Matter What the Circumstances. #3 Saves me Everyday
  • How to Take an Awesome Vacation Every Six Months, 4 Tips on Finding Travel Deals
  • How to Be Happy Everyday: 10 Tips (#8 is golden)

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Happiness For the Practical Mind by Jared Akers

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