How to Be Happy
At 12:34 P.M. Friday, April 24th 2009, Juniper Pearl came into the world at 7lbs 7oz. My beautiful wife Emily’s son and his wife had a perfect baby girl. So yes, that would make me a 38 year old grandpa. It just doesn’t get any better than this.
A few years ago, prior to meeting my wife, I prayed for two things; that God would put someone special in my life, and that if it was His will, children would be in my future. Reminds me of the Craig Morgan song, “God Must Really Love Me.”
Do you know someone that is consistently late? Is it you? Are you usually late to appointments, lunches, meetings, or with deadlines? If you are, the message you are sending to the ones waiting on you is clear: Your time is more important than theirs. It’s selfish and inconsiderate.
Everyone is busy.
I used to be late a lot! I was rarely on time for anything, especially if someone was counting on me. I usually let them down. Nine times out of ten it was due to something selfish on my part. I wanted to catch the end of the game, it cut into my party time, or simply, it was inconvenient. Maybe I overslept because I stayed up too late the night before, and for the times I didn’t show up at all, I simply didn’t feel like it. No matter what it was, they were all excuses. They all send the same message; my time is more important than yours.
Back in the early 90’s I was as a zookeeper. Each Spring we would transport the Spider Monkeys from the indoor tropical building to a wonderful outdoor enclosure with trees and grass. Yay for the spider monkeys! Since none of us spoke Spider Monkey, we couldn’t really tell them what we were doing. For all they knew we were coming in to eat them so they always freaked out when we came walking towards them with nets. They didn’t know we were just trying to help them, that we were taking them to a great place to frolic in the sun and play in the grass and swing from the trees.
There are two questions I get asked a lot:
1. How do you maintain such a positive attitude?
2. How do you keep from getting angry?
Two words come to mind: Perspective and Practice.
Perspective is something I gained through life experience and hard work.
Several years ago I was at a bottom emotionally. Life was just too hard, or so I thought at the time. I wanted to die; I was tired of trying, tired of failing. But something made me get up and try again; this time, with the desperation of a drowning man. If I didn’t find something… well I just had to find something. With the help of others, and a fearless moral inventory of myself and my past, I realized I did not treat myself well. I would not have treated someone I loved that way. I got honest, trusted people who had similar experiences, and allowed them to love me until I learned to love myself.
Sometimes we fall backwards, or so we think. Everyone makes mistakes right? So why are we sometimes more forgiving of others than we are of ourselves?
“Each day is a day of progress, steady progress forward, if you make it so.”
– Twenty-Four Hours a Day (Hazelden Education Materials) March 31st
Everyone makes mistakes, including myself. By accepting the fact that I make mistakes, and practicing self-forgiveness, I can more easily forgive others.
So the next time we make a mistake, let’s not be so hard on ourselves… OK?