Happiness Articles

Learning how to find happiness can certainly be a lifelong journey. But that does not mean you'll never know how to be happy long-term. It's simply a process like anything else, with peaks and valleys. But the reward can be a more consistent ride and finding a flow with less extreme highs and lows.

What is Your Authentic Self?

by Jared Akers

You hear people say it all the time, “be true to yourself,” “to thine own self be true,” “find your authentic self.”

What does that mean exactly? What is your authentic self?

For me, part of it was having my outsides match my insides. That is, portraying the same person externally to the world as the man I am inside.

For example, showing the world one thing (having your crap together) on the outside while being completely scared sh#tless on the inside.

It also means finally living up to the ideal self that I believed (but sometimes doubted) I could be.

Do You Want it More Than You Are Afraid of It?

by Jared Akers

Hanging out on Facebook the other day I saw a quote posted by Henri over at Wakeup Cloud. The quote was from Bill Cosby and it said, “Decide that you want it, more than you are afraid of it.”

Henri’s comment on his FB post was, “When you make this shift, everything changes.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Real change starts when we decide that no matter how great the fear, the possible payoff is worth it. Moreover, with this perspective and attitude, we have the open-mindedness and perseverance to turn obstacles into challenges.

The Convergence of Emotional and Financial Support [Read more…]

Learning to Love Yourself, Are You a Liar? (plus one awesome tip on loving yourself today)

by Jared Akers

Are you trying to alter the lens of others in order to be liked?

When someone asks you to do something you don’t feel like doing, do you fabricate some story or excuse? In other words, do you lie?

Chances are you do, or have in the past. Or, like me, maybe you’ve been doing it so long you don’t even realize you’re doing it.

It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, we just want people to like us. It’s natural to think that by telling someone you have to mow your lawn will hurt their feelings less then “I don’t feel like hanging out with you.”

Just Say No, You Don’t Have to Lie Anymore

In the summer of 2006, shortly after starting my journey into self-discovery, I was working for a friend installing radon mitigation systems in residential homes. I was scheduled to do an install one week and decided to blow it off because I just didn’t feel like doing it. So I rescheduled for the following week. [Read more…]

How to Find Yourself: 5 Tips on Discovering Who You Really Are

by Jared Akers

“The image of myself which I try to create in my own mind in order that I may love myself is very different from the image which I try to create in the minds of others in order that they may love me.”
-W.H. Auden

In the ever expanding niche of personal and self-development, there’s a lot of talk about how to find yourself. I should know, I’ve written an entire book on it, Happiness for the Practical Mind: 7 Steps to Discovering and Loving Your Authentic Self.

So what does it mean to find oneself?

I lived most of my life in a way I thought was expected; striving for an identity which society seemed to reward. All the while not really sure who I was or what I wanted out of life. It’s odd really, thinking now that I was chasing what others perceived to be important.

When sitting down to write on this topic, something continually came to my mind… it’s a line from the movie The Way, “You don’t choose a life dad, you live one. “ [Read more…]

How to Live Happy, 2 Tips That Will Change Your Life

by Jared Akers

There are four questions of value in life… What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love.
– Johnny Depp

I’ve suffered and worked hard so hopefully you don’t have to.

Here are two tips that will help you live happy and relatively fulfilled:

1. Seek love (for self) rather than acceptance.

2. Life is about learning, not winning.

Love & Acceptance

While doing research for my upcoming book, I came across the comprehensive longitudinal study, the Grant Study. Where Harvard researchers examined and followed two hundred sixty-eight men over seventy-two years. I wrote a blog post about it over at GoodLifeZen.com titled “Love Really is All You Need” which discusses the gist of the study, that Happiness is Love, full stop.

Are you going about it backwards?

Are you seeking acceptance as opposed to love?

I’m pretty sure that’s what I was doing.
[Read more…]