“Emotional intelligence as the subset of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and actions.” – Salovey & Mayer
Emily and I just returned from a trip to Belize and shared a little bit about our great vacation; diving with sharks and eating lionfish!
We start off by sharing what emotional intelligence means to us. The ability to make rational decisions and not just react based on the immediate emotion felt.
We talk about how to avoid emotional blind spots by feeling the emotions completely and then being able to detach from them in a healthy manner. In the past, I had a lot of emotional blind spots; emotions I avoided because they were uncomfortable since I was emotionally immature.
There’s a difference in being emotional and emotionally mature or connected.
Being more emotionally intelligent makes us better communicators. We can be more empathetic.
By being more emotionally connected, we can communicate more through energy and pick up on non-verbal cues; people pick-up on emotionally intelligence, both consciously and sub-consciously.
It’s healthy to be emotionally connected with self; we have empathy for self and thus care more about how we’re treated, both by ourselves and others.
Positive thinking only works if we put things into action, it should be power of positive doing.
Laughter is powerful because it forces you to be completely in the moment.
Crying is good.
Emotional Intelligence is awareness and mindfulness; the ability to be a witness to your emotions sometimes referred to as cultivating the witness. We can let the conversations and emotional battles go on inside our heads without being involved. This allows us to make more rational decisions and communicate more effectively.
Sometimes when we feel hurt, it helps to stop and stay “it’s not about me.” And once we say that, then it isn’t about us anymore.
Topics in this episode:
- Ramon’s Village, San Pedro, Belize
- Search Inside Yourself (Amazon): The Unexpected Path to Achieving Success, Happiness (and World Peace) by Chade-Meng Tan
- Tuesdays with Morrie (Amazon)
- Louis C.K. (warning, explicit)
- Field of Dreams
- Life As a House