Comments on: Wants vs. Needs and Spiritual Growth

By: Jared

Jared — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 11:39:36 +0000

Alex,
Thanks for stopping by! This process really works well for me. There’s always something to be grateful for, sometimes I just tend to focus on the things I don’t have. It takes practice to learn how to turn that around when you’re feeling it.

By: Alex

Alex — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:54:04 +0000

So the next time you think about something you don’t have, turn it around and find gratitude for something you do have!
Hmm sounds like Byron Katie
Great Article
Alex

By: Magnolia

Magnolia — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 11:59:16 +0000

P.S. Please forgive my above grammar and syntax erros.

By: Magnolia

Magnolia — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 11:57:48 +0000

I’ve always said that everyone needs a good life-altering crisis to put things in proper perspective.

In my early twenties (I’m now in my early fifties) I had a couple of these. It drastically reshaped my life. Though very painful and not something I would actually *recommend* to anyone to learn some valuable life lessons, I don’t honestly think I would be the person today or have the capacity to put life in perspective had I not gone through that very difficult and painful time.

It’s too easy to become insulated in life when everything goes your way. I also think it tends to breed a self-suffienct hautiness as well. When people become that way, they almost always become condemning and critical of others who are not up to speed with “they” are.

So, again, nothing like a good crisis to keep you humble.

By: Jared

Jared — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 11:38:36 +0000

Emily-Sarah,
Thanks for the comment. The thing about perspective for me was, I really didn’t have much of one until I went through some really tough life experiences. I was running last night and listening to this song by Craig Morgan called, This Ain’t Nothin’ and it’s about this old man who just lost everything in a tornado and a reporter is asking him what it feels like to lose everything. His response is “This Ain’t Nothin’” and goes on to talk about loosing his hand in a war, lost his dad when he was eight years old, held the hand of his wife as her heart stopped beating, all this things. That money can replace the things the tornado took away and it is nothing time won’t heal. It really made me realize how I have everything I need. Knowing what I’ve been through and my perspective on life, I realize what things are really important, the people and relationships in my life.

Thanks for stopping by

By: Jared

Jared — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 23:39:14 +0000

Patricia,
Thanks for the great comments! That’s funny you mentioned the HD TV. My wife and I just purchased a new cable package and I was all excited because we finally got to use our HD TV. Then we decided the extra $ for HD a month wasn’t worth it so we got rid of the HD service. Now we’ve been looking at new HD TV’s. Doesn’t make sense, ha! But we enjoy spending time watching a few of “our” shows. We like the DVR function so we can pause during commercials and discuss the show. We also do movie (DVD) night at least once a week. But we refuse to watch local news (most news) because the media demands only showing negative things. It’s really depressing. We often talk about starting a news program that runs the same time most local news runs and only showing positive things that are happening in the community. Sad things is, we probably wouldn’t have any subscribers.

By: emily-sarah

emily-sarah — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 22:09:48 +0000

This is such a great post. And it’s so true that our perspective is responsible for how we look at things and respond. Thanks for this powerful reminder!

By: Patricia

Patricia — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 21:18:38 +0000

Good post and nice writing – Thank you, I enjoyed your topic very much.
Dr. Marshall Rosenberg in his book Nonviolent Communications breaks needs into a bigger collection and by doing that he made needs more “real” to me in my living.
He makes this list of needs: Autonomy, Celebration, Integrity, Interdependence, Physical Nurturance, Play, and Spiritual Communion. He give them some more definition, but his list gives me a wider scope to assess my needs and wants and to see what value that are exposing.
When I look at the purchase of my new HD TV, I bought a TV because I thought in the future my partner and I would enjoy watching it as we grew older (and maybe wiser ) and I had the resources to acquire this item at this time in my life and to continue paying for it’s cable and electricity maintenance. In the year of having this TV, we have now added time to our schedule to watch something on TV – we have watched a DVD for 12 Saturday nights and have a quick supper. We have watched Bill Moyer’s Journal and put that on the schedule…..
We can keep our value of our purchase in line with our needs. I find this makes life much easier to navigate and certainly much more pleasant for me

By: jonathan figaro

jonathan figaro — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 20:05:53 +0000

Happiness is a state of mind which can be attained from making progress. Only progress can truly make us happy at the end of the day. We have to make daily steps toward progress by finding a purpose in life, developing a positive attitude and appreciating life for all it glory. Here are a few tips to creating the life you deserve

1. Find A Purpose
2. Make daily steps
3. Be grateful

By: Jared

Jared — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 12:02:43 +0000

Magnolia,
Thanks for the great comments! I went through a shift several years ago when I surrendered and went in to treatment for the 3rd time. I left behind any belief system I may have had and any idea of what I thought I knew about life. I left it all behind and started at ground zero. It was scary, but also liberating as well. I still remember the day… I was out of treatment and living in a halfway house, I had been going to a ton of meetings and had a sponsor and was working the steps, I was pulling into a gas station and had this overwhelming feeling that I had no clue what my life was suppose to be about anymore. For most of my life I had this “fantasy” in my head of what my life would look like when I had “made it” or reached what I thought was successful. It involved a Porsche, a loft overlooking a great skyline, a beautiful wife, and at the top of my game professionally. I gave up on that idea and realized I had no clue on how to live life. BUT, what I did have was this overwhelming feeling of peace and serenity. The knowing deep in my heart that if I just kept it simple, lived each day doing the next right thing, trusting in whatever higher power I was beginning to know through the steps, go to meetings, and trust my sponsor, that no matter what happened, everything was going to be OK. I just felt it in my soul and believed it to be true.

Sure, ever since then at times my faith has wavered, I too am a thinker. Early on I was told to “stay out of my head.” Of course I had no idea how to do that. I’ve learned since that I can do that by moving my feet and helping someone else… seeing where I can be of service. And at times my “belief system is always getting rearranged somehow” but I know that to be part of the process. And beneath it is still the fundamental belief that as long as I do three things everyday, I’ll be OK; 1. Trust God, 2. Clean House, 3. Help others. There are days when I’m in 20% doubt and 80% faith, and others where I’m at 20% faith and 80% doubt, but I accept that as part of the ebb and flow of my spiritual growth.

I spent most of my life thinking about acquiring physical things, thinking they would make me happy. Then I went through the process in the steps and cleaned my mental house, did the hard work and enjoy the benefits each and every day. Now my life is about cleaning my mental house each day and moving onto cleaning out my physical house of things which I do not need. It’s the same with my mental housecleaning, I needed to get rid of the things that were keeping me from growing spiritually.

Thanks for the great comments and sharing your journey.