Hello middle man, please step into my office. Huh? What’s that?

Why you say?

Because you’re fired.

I always want to have the best stuff up here as possible in case my future agent stops by and realizes today is the day, if I have something amazing posted, she’s going to offer me that book deal. And then I was reading a post by WSL (Worlds Strongest Library) and he quotes Seth Godin,

If someone can write down your job description, they can find someone to do your job cheaper. There’s no job description that describes being yourself.

I was thinking the other day (you’ve been warned) that I used to be quite witty; funny actually… although that’s what people say when they’re not funny. Do crazy people know they’re crazy? And then I started to wonder if I still was or if any humor comes through in my writing at all. Of course I also wondered once if I was a sociopath since someone smarter than I suggested they always seem to know just what to say and how to make people happy. And now I’m realizing that anyone that says they’re witty probably isn’t.

I’m tired of writing correct. Laboring over every sentence and thinking about grammar. So from now on, I’m just writing. However it comes out. My thoughts from head to fingers to screen. I’m firing the middle man, the one who tells me there’s a better way to say something or I should Google that word to make sure it’s spelled correctly or used in the right context. Sometimes people who write like this annoy me, sometimes I find it liberating and fun. Maybe this doesn’t sound any different to you than how I normally write… hmm, I didn’t think of that. Oh, well, it feels different, freeing. I always felt that short quick sentences made me sound angry. Do I sound angry? I don’t feel angry… wait maybe I am. Angry that I can’t just dish out these posts quickly and that I try to make every single post on here the best it can be. Actually angry is a strong term, I don’t get angry; frustrated maybe.

So I’m letting it go…. ahhh, I feel better already. Have I told you all lately how much I love you? No? Well then, I love you. Yes you reading this (I’m not talking to myself now I’m talking to you the reader) I love you. Thanks for reading this.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my writing… like, am I a writer? If I had a choice would I do this every day of my life? Actually, with all the other sites and online stuff I’m working on I pretty much do write every day. I like it; I think overall I’m passionate about it. I’m in the middle of reading Career Renegade by Jonathon Fields (along with a few others); it really makes you look at your passions in a different way. I love it; having passions.

If I ever want to become a professional writer, I need practice; I need to try different things. So that’s what I’m doing; I’m trying to write more freely. Hope you like it, if not, go somewhere else. Gasp; did I really just say that? You know I love you and don’t want you to go, and I seriously doubt my beautiful style of writing is what keeps you around.

I’m grateful for the movie Bruce Almighty, besides being a great movie it’s helped me stop misspelling b-e-a-u-ti-ful

I’m going to try and be more free with my writing here because… well, you want to know how much money I make off this blog? Zero.  Actually that’s not true; as of March 21, 2010 I’ve made $4.98 from an affiliate sale on one of the books I used to have in my sidebar. This is OK because I never really started this blog to make money anyway. Of course I’d be lying if I said I didn’t hope deep down somewhere it would create a six figure income, but I doubt that will happen. What is totally cool is all the people that write me and tell me what a great job I’m doing. Obviously not very many people comment on my blog, but I don’t let it bother me because I’m not seeking acceptance. I’m just sharing my experience and hopefully someone gets some value out of it. You may also notice that I do not post the number of blog subscribers I have like some other high profile blogs. I guess I wanted everyone to think this blog was followed by thousands of people… truth is, you’re one of 148 subscribers. This is totally cool because that means you’re that much more special to me!

So what’s the future of How To Be Happy… Hmmm, who knows… like my spirituality and view and experience with happiness it evolves over time. At the current moment I’m working on fifteen other web site properties (and adding more constantly) in addition to my full-time job and my amazing life as a husband and grandfather. I absolutely LOVE my life and everyone in it; including writing on this blog. And as many of you know, I hate setting expectations because they only lead to resentments. So I’m not setting any expectations for Spiritual Zen myself. Well, that’s it for now, I’m hitting publish!

Have I told you how much I love you lately?

Step Into My Office, Cause You’re Fired! is a post from: How To Be Happy
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On our recent trip to Cozumel I had an interesting experience. On our second day of diving I had an issue with my regulator. The regulator, which consists of multiple parts, is what enables you to breathe underwater. Pretty important.

First a little background.

Up until a few years ago I had never gotten sea sick, but it seems that once I started diving, smaller boats seem to make me a little nauseous. Specifically during surface intervals (SI) (the time on the surface between dives to allow an excess nitrogen release from your body). SI’s are generally spent sitting on a boat or on the way to the next dive site which can be brutal. I’ve spent a few feeding the fish. I’ve tried everything, ginger pills, bonine, etc. but this time I had a prescription for the motion sickness patch you put behind your ear. I got the prescription last summer and tried the patch a few days while at home to make sure it didn’t have any weird effect and it seemed fine. The first day diving in Cozumel I was fine without the patch, the sea was calm and the boat we were on was fairly large. The second day was calling for choppy seas so the night before I put the patch on. In the middle of the night I woke up a little dizzy, the patch was making me feel a little disoriented and nauseous. I know… isn’t it suppose to prevent that? Being a recovered alcoholic, I’m really, really, really careful about taking any medication and never take anything that makes me feel “different.” I don’t like feeling different, I like having a clear head and connected spiritually. So when I woke up a little disoriented I immediately took the patch off.

Upon waking to go diving around 7:30 a.m., I was still a little “off” but after breakfast and a little coffee I was fine. We got on the boat and headed out to the first dive which was scheduled for around 80ft. When traveling, the only SCUBA equipment we bring are our wetsuits, fins, and masks. We rent the rest (BCD and regulators), tanks and weights are always included as part of the dive packages. So basically we rent the most crucial part of breathing under water, the regulator. This is fairly common since carrying all this stuff while traveling can be a pain and most dive shops are good about changing out their equipment and have them serviced regularly. Once on the dive boat, you connect all your gear, turn on your air, put the regulator in your mouth and make sure you can get air out of it. That’s about all you really know at this point about your regulator, that air does come out of it.

For some reason on this trip I decided to wear a 5mm full wetsuit, which is pretty thick for tropical waters, but I don’t like getting cold. The thicker and newer the wetsuit, the more positively buoyant you are thus the more weight you need to descend. I was pretty sure I had enough weight (18 lbs), which worked the day before. So… I (along with the other 6 divers and my wife) get all our gear on and giant stride of the back of the boat into the ocean one after another like penguins. Everyone begins to descend as I’m clearing out and refitting my mask. I release the air from my BC and begin to descend… maybe. I’m not descending as quickly as usual… maybe I don’t have enough weight. No big deal, I’ll just invert a little and kick my way down. As I begin to invert and get farther submerged I notice my regulator isn’t breathing that easily, actually it feels as if there’s a kink in it. I breath a little harder and continue to invert and start kicking. As I do, being almost upside down causes some water to come into my regulator and I sort of choke on it.

OK, this totally freaks me out and I immediately surface. Meanwhile all the other divers are now at about 15 – 20 feet while the dive master (DM) is hanging out to make sure I’m OK. On the surface I explain that my regulator is breathing “funny” as I’m coughing and switching over to my octopus (secondary air source). I’m sort of embarrassed. The DM says OK and begins to descend down to catch up with the other divers. Still coughing I look over at the dive boat floating about 30 feet away as the captain stairs down at me from a rocking boat and asks if everything is OK. I say or motion something like, “I’m not sure.” I think about getting back on the boat and calling it quits. I’m also thinking I feel a little disoriented because of the patch but I’m not sure. I realize that if I do get sick, I’ll be sitting on the boat for the next 45 minutes while the other divers finish their dive. That doesn’t sound attractive either. I’ve learned from experience, that the sooner you get submerged and relax the sickness and nausea will usually go away. All this is going through my head as I reposition my mask and test breathing out of my octopus. Seems to be breathing OK… let’s try this again.

This time I ascend using my octopus as my primary air source and hold onto it with my hand as I invert and begin kicking. My breathing is quickening as the anxiety is still in my head and I’m questioning whether or not I can do this. I’m still close enough to the surface and every part of my body is saying, “Go up, not down!” Besides freaking out, I’m beating myself up for freaking out, I can do this! I remind myself that I have air, everything is alright, just keep kicking. The farther I get from the surface the more I realize that if I get past a certain depth, there’s no going back. I look at my dive computer, 20 feet… keep breathing.

What is it… the NDL (No Decompression Limit)? OH yeah, well since this is my first dive of the day, 60 feet is the maximum no decompression depth I can get to and still do an emergency ascent without exploding my lungs… at least that’s what I’m telling myself. I should have refreshed my dive knowledge on the plane down here. I see my wife with her fingers in the OK sign, asking me if I’m OK. I sign back, “I’m OK” although I’m only partly sure. This dive is to a maximum of 80 feet so I know I’ll be past 60 feet for a while. I look at my dive watch, 45 feet. I can see all the other divers now towards the bottom and what a beautiful view.

God the ocean is so beautiful. Oh yeah, I’m 50 feet underwater and I’m breathing. That’s right, I’m breathing. I have air coming through this hose and into my lungs. I check my air gauge, 2800 PSI, I have plenty of air. I can breath and wow, look at all the fish. 60 feet and the current is starting to take me and I’m catching up to the other divers. I reach my right hand back behind my right hip and feel for the air dump that’s usually found on most BCD’s. Ahh, there it is; I pull it hard to make sure I’ve gotten all the air out of my BCD to help me continue descending. I still have the regulator in my hand holding it firm in my mouth. I think about maybe switching back to my primary and run through the procedure in my mind; take a breath, pull the octopus out of my mouth remembering to slowly blow bubbles while switching regulators (you never hold your breathe while diving, you’re lungs can expand and it’s not good), put the primary in my mouth, purge it, exhale any air left in my lungs and breathe. Wait… this one has air and I’m doing fine, you might inhale some water and you’re just now recovering from freak mode. Leave it alone.

Once I reached about 75 feet and stabilized my buoyancy I began to relax. I knew I was down here for the long-haul now and needed to get a control on my breathing to conserve air. I’m an air-head anyway and am sure my anxiousness used up more than usual on the descent. I don’t want to be the first one low on air, again. So I relax and tell myself I’m OK, that I have air (2500 PSI), and to just breathe normally and let the current do the work. God this is beautiful. I have air, I’m OK.

The dive ended fine and I didn’t have any issues the rest of the week.

Many times in my life I go back to the first days of recovery and remind myself that in any given moment, everything is OK. When life get’s crazy or seemingly too much to handle, sometimes all I can do is stop and remind myself to breathe. I have air and everything is OK. That right now, in this moment, everything is fine.

Although I’m thinking about purchasing my own regulator.

Just Breathe! is a post from: How To Be Happy
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For the last several years I have been speaking once a month at a drug and rehab center; the same one which I had been a patient myself for alcohol. On the third Sunday of every month I would make the 1 1/2 hour drive to the center and speak for an hour. I would talk about my life, play some songs I’d written, and share my experience, strength, and hope.

I would share what it was like, what happened, and what it is like now. Last month was my last time speaking. At least for now. I decided to quit and give someone else a chance to fill my slot. I struggled with the decision for a while, but prayed about it often. It has been a really important part of my recovery.

Last Sunday would have been my weekend, and I didn’t even realize it until Monday morning. Probably because I spent Sunday afternoon with my wife, step-son and daughter, and our beautiful granddaughter. It is so amazing what the smile of a child can do.

I remember sitting there when I was a patient, listening to speakers like myself, and hearing them talk about how bad it had been, what happened, and how amazing their life had become. I would take notes. Could that possibly happen for me?

I really couldn’t relate, my life was such a mess and I was just struggling to find a reason to live. I used the power of now often, just looking around at where I was, concentrating on the fact that in that moment, I was alive and OK. Never mind the piles of bills I had accumulated, the wreckage I had caused in other peoples lives, plus no job and no place to live when I got out of treatment.

I learned to just concentrate on what I could do that day. “So then, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today has enough trouble of its own” (Mathew 6:34). I was really forced into each moment, simply to survive. My counselor, bless her heart, helped me so much. She offered a simple suggestion of making a list.

A list of all the things I was worried about. So I wrote down things like; call Ford to see about getting out of my lease, find a place to live, ask for help with income tax, etc. Each day I would look at the list and ask: Is there something on here I can take action on today? If YES, I would take the action; if NO, I would put it out of my mind and go on with my day.

A Rainy Day in 2004
My fiancé’ and I are sitting at an intersection in the pouring rain waiting for the light to change. Across the intersection I see our destination, a loan office where a check is waiting to pay for our engagement ring. I start a fight. Something inside me is saying this isn’t the right thing to be doing—the engagement, not the fighting.

It’s not what I want, or maybe it just doesn’t feel right. Shouldn’t it feel right? I keep telling myself it should, I should want to get married to someone I love. So I pick a fight. If I make her angry enough, she’ll leave me since I don’t have the balls to do it myself. Then it will be her fault, and not mine.

I should want this right? After all, this is what people in love do. They get married and start a family. I do love her, at least as much as I’ve loved anyone. We’re arguing about something as the light changes and we move across the intersection, sloshing through the running water and pull into the parking lot. The sky is angry and I’m sure she’s crying now. She get’s out and I follow, stopping her under the buildings overhang just out of reach of the pouring rain.

Tears and rain dripping down her face, I grab her and tell her this is what I want. She should go in and get the check, we’ll be fine and I want to get married. We got married in January of ‘05, annulled in July ‘05, a year later I hit my bottom.

When I got out of treatment I moved into a recovery house. The closest AA meeting was only a few miles away and I quickly realized I would have to drive through the “rainy intersection” every day on the way to meetings. It was a constant reminder of a painful past.

But I did what was suggested to get better. I went to meetings, I got a sponsor and starting working the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. I worked hard at developing some type of spiritual life. I prayed for others.

I prayed for my ex and that she would have all the wonderful things in life that I wanted in mine; love, peace, and family. I started learning how to have a healthy relationship with myself. I took each day for the blessing that it was and tried to simply do the next right thing in every moment.

As a result, a funny thing happened. One day I realized it had been months since I thought about the “rainy intersection,” yet I was still driving through it every day. And when I did remember, it wasn’t the painful thorn I had experienced before. It was more of a gentle nudge that had gotten me to where I was at this moment in time. That was it, that was proof that God, or something, was doing for me what I could not do by myself, heal.

Everyone has their own “rainy intersection,” something from their past that continues to stir up pain. Pain we allow by continually focusing on it with regret or remorse. To get past these emotional black holes, all I had to do was take baby steps, concentrating on one step and one day at a time. Focusing only on things right in front of me.

I realized with this approach anything was possible. In the last three years I have finished my Bachelors in IT and went on to get my Masters in Business Administration. I’ve gotten married and now have a granddaughter. Everything I do, I accomplish one day, one moment at a time. In Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life (Amazon link) by Anne Lamott, the writer explains how, when distracted, she tries to focus on a one-inch piece of the story:

So after I’ve completely exhausted myself thinking about the people I most resent in the world, and my more arresting financial problems, and, or course, the orthodontia, I remember to pick up the one-inch picture frame and to figure out a one-inch piece of my story to tell, one small scene, one memory, one exchange. I also remember a story that I know I’ve told elsewhere but that over and over helps me to get a grip: Thirty years ago my older brother, who was ten years old at the time, was trying to get a report on birds written that he’d had three months to write. It was due the next day. We were out at our family cabin in Bolinas, and he was at the kitchen table close to tears, surrounded by binder paper and pencils and unopened books on birds, immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead. Then my father sat down beside him, put his arm around my brother’s shoulder, and said, ‘Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird’.

Our granddaughter is a little over 6 months old and hasn’t taken her first steps yet, but it’s amazing to watch her grow and change from week to week. One week she couldn’t really use her hands, then a few days later she’s grabbing at everything in sight. I can’t wait until she starts taking baby steps. I just know her little steps will take her far.

Lord knows how far little steps have taken me. Sometimes the steps are as uncomfortable, unnatural, or even painful as I imagine they might be for a child the first time. But as I step through them, I’m better able to face them tomorrow armed with the wisdom of today.

Today, all the things I prayed for others to receive, I have received ten-fold. Love, peace, and family.

When life get’s a little overwhelming, get out a pen and paper and right down everything that is weighing on your mind. Ask yourself if there is any REAL action you can do with each thing on your list? Yes? Do it. No? Let it go until you can or decide it’s time to take action. Now what’s the next thing you should be doing? Just concentrate on taking the next right step in each moment. Next thing you know, you’ll be looking back towards the mountains you’ve climbed!

photo credit: Jessica Bee

Baby Steps: Climbing Mountains One Action at a Time is a post from: How To Be Happy
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Welcome back to The Spiritual Serenity Series: 7 Steps to Inner Peace and Happiness. Last week we looked at Acceptance. This week, we are going to look at identification.

Step 3: Identification

Now that I have accepted what needs to change, I can identify what areas I need to work on. Remember, just because we accept something, does not mean we have to like it.

I identified that a self-destructive life run on self-will had seriously contaminated my thinking over the years. The void inside my soul existed no matter what I filled it with; be it money, profession, alcohol, relationships, etc., nothing worked. I was emotionally and spiritually bankrupt and as a result, my thinking was extremely misguided.

Nadia over at HappyLotus said it nicely in her post The First Step to Happiness:

“Usually the desire for material items as a means to happiness is a cover for an emotional issue. Granted this is not always the case … So be careful to distinguish why you want certain things and that will be the first step of your journey to finding happiness.”

It wasn’t hard to identify that I was not happy. A constant cloud of doom-and-gloom seemed to follow me everywhere. The feeling, I believe, started at the age of twenty. After becoming a zookeeper—a childhood dream—I discovered I was not satisfied and resigned to the fact that I never would be.

I was suffering from a spiritual malady. I was trying to fill a spiritual hole with material things. I think I knew this for years but resisted any real change. In other words, I refused to accept it. I would attend church here or there, shopping around for something spiritual I could connect with. However, the thought of turning my will and life over to a mystical power was out of the question. That was until I reached a bottom (one of many) on March 12th of 2006. It was then that something snapped. I walked out of that despair with a new resolve. I would abandon every conceived notion of what I perceived life to be about up to that point. I would ask for help and do whatever it took to get better, even if it meant believing in something I could not see. If my life was to continue, it would be on a different path, for the one I was living was not worth the pain anymore. As the saying goes, I was not afraid of dying, but was scared to death of living another day.

Many of these steps I suggest are most valuable when we have someone to help us through them. For me, it was a spiritual adviser as well as counselors and therapist. Finding a person who can help us learn about ourselves, and is trained to do so, can be invaluable.

I identified that my life had become unmanageable. Left on my own, I would destroy myself. What I needed was something more powerful than myself to believe in. I was ill equipped in living up to the self-imposed expectations of myself, the world around me, and my place in it. I identified that if I was to keep on living, I needed serious help.

So now that I’ve identified that something needs to change, and we’re not talking about something simple here like geographical or material. We need to have a complete change in our thinking—a psychic change! For that we’re going to need some help which I’ll talk about next on self-searching.

Have you identified any real big changes that need to take place in your life? Share in the comments!

The next step in The Serenity Series is Self-Searching. I’m really looking forward to this one! Its going to be a little longer post since its where some real amazing things started happening for me. I love this stuff! And I love all of you! Thanks for stopping by again.

Next up, step 4: Self-Searching

UPDATE: It is my intent to have posts here at How To Be Happy will continue to be mostly on a weekly basis I hope. I try to hold myself to at least one good post per week. Since I’ve finished school, I’m done with deadlines for a while and am working on several other projects. However, I am hoping to post some short videos of myself and what I’m working on soon. Just to make things more personal—probably in between these more serious topics.

photo credit: h.koppdelaney

The Spiritual Serenity Series: Step 3, Identification is a post from: How To Be Happy
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This is my last week of school and my wife and I leave on Saturday (06/13/09) for a week vacation in Curacao.

I really wanted to get this awesome article I’m working on up before I left. However, it’s really turning into something I’m excited about and so I am considering making it a series. The working title is: “The Happiness Series: 6 Steps to Inner Peace and Happiness” “The Spiritual Serenity Series: 7 Steps to Inner Peace and Happiness” and it was inspired by this quote:

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
~Ghandi

The quote really resonated with me and I believe it to be right on! The article(s) will be about getting our thoughts, words, and actions in harmony.

Instead of rushing it (or deciding to make it into a series simply because I’m running out of time), I’m going to wait and finish when I get back from vacation. This week is pretty busy already and I really want to be present… especially with my wife as we get started packing and gearing up for our vacation. If I’m thinking about this article in the back of my head… well, I just won’t be as present as I need to be.

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with a few thoughts and quotations I have accumulated for article topics. I thought I would throw some out here and see what sticks! Let me know in the comments if any of these hit a chord or inspire you! Maybe they’ll end up as article topics someday!  (We return to the States on the 20th, so look for a great new post somewhere around the 24!)

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
~Lao Tzu

“When I hear somebody sigh, ‘life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, compared to what?”
~Sydney Harris

“The idea keeps persisting that the instincts are primarily bad and are the roadblocks before which all spirituality falters. I believe that the difference between good and evil is not the difference between spiritual and instinctual man; it is the difference between proper and improper use of the instinctual. Recognition and right channeling of the instinctual are the essence of achieving wholeness.”
~Bill Wilson, As Bill Sees It

“Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past.”
~Lily Tomlin

photo credit: Erica_Marshall

Leaving for Curacao is a post from: How To Be Happy
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Hello everyone. I just wanted to post a message letting everyone know what’s going on with my life and the future of How to Be Happy.

Yesterday I started my LAST class (Strategic Management) for my MBA program. The class runs six weeks with the last day of class on June 12th. I can’t believe my teammates and I are almost there!

The very next morning (June 13th) at 5:30 a.m. my wife and I will be on a plane headed for Curaçao for a week! Yay SCUBA diving!

Up to this point, I have really tried to make one good post a week here on How to Be Happy. My goal has been two but I haven’t quite done that. I DO have a ton of content I want to get to. I use BackPackIt to keep track of all my ideas and there’s tons of stuff I have in the pipeline. It’s just hard with school getting tougher and consuming more of my time to get two posts a week. Not to mention my full time job and new granddaughter!

I did however re-do my About page as part of the 31 Days to Build a Better Blog Challenge—which I’m NOT doing in 31 days believe me—so be sure to check it out.

I’m just asking for all of you who read How to Be Happy to hang in there, and please don’t unsubscribe because you don’t get 2-3 new posts every week. Once school is over, I plan on getting my groove on! Like I said, I have a lot of GREAT stuff to share. I also may try some shorter, more to the point posts. I know some day’s, when going through my RSS reader, I don’t feel like spending 20 minutes reading a long post. But I also don’t want to limit myself either. Just letting my feelings flow is what this is about right?

Thanks again for reading and please leave any comments on what I can do to make How to Be Happy better!

What’s Up With Jared? May 3, 2009 is a post from: How To Be Happy
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At 12:34 P.M. Friday,  April 24th 2009, Juniper Pearl came into the world at 7lbs 7oz. My beautiful wife Emily’s son and his wife had a perfect baby girl. So yes, that would make me a 38 year old grandpa. It just doesn’t get any better than this.

A few years ago, prior to meeting my wife, I prayed for two things; that God would put someone special in my life, and that if it was His will, children would be in my future. Reminds me of the Craig Morgan song, “God Must Really Love Me.”

A new life comes into the world is a post from: How To Be Happy
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I didn’t know 7 Eleven’s slogan was “Thank Heaven for 7 Eleven.” I know, I know, not sure where I’ve been for the last 30 years or so. I was getting gas there yesterday and their little screen at the pre-pay pump displayed “Thank Heaven” on it. I thought, wow, that’s cool. Amen to that. My wife informed me that was their slogan, not just a personal little message for me. Oh well, I took it as one.

Thank Heaven for 7 Eleven is a post from: How To Be Happy
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I am free. Standing on the tip of a rock overlooking the pacific ocean on the beautiful island of Kauai, I am free. A few days prior I married my best friend, Emily, I am free.

I’ve been to this island before, I’ve been married here before, but I was a prisoner then. A prisoner to living a life on self will. I don’t remember much then, only that I was terrified inside of what my life had become and where it was going. I was chained to the thought that I could find happiness in my life if only I could manage it better.

The life I had then is gone, the person I was then is gone, it died the day I turned my will and my life over to my Higher Power, God.

This time, I see God’s presence every where. The day before our wedding, Emily and I went on a shore dive off Koloa landing and saw two octopus mating. How cool is that! It’s rare to see octopus, not to mention to see them mating! On our boat dive, we saw lots of critters (too many to mention) but the highlight was the endanged Hawaiian Monk Seal.

I had proposed to Emily on November 1st and we were kicking around plans for a wedding but nothing major. We talked about waiting until next year but an island wedding also sounded romantic. Yes, Emily knew I had been married on Kauai once before and we decided to do a little foot-work and see if it worked out. And we prayed about it. We sent out a few emails and made a few calls once on the island. We arrived on Kauai on Saturday 11/29, traveled to Kalaheo on Sunday to get our marriage license from a lady named Sandra, who let us pick fresh tangerines from her tree. And on Tuesday (12/02) we were wed by Caroline Miura with Sacred Ceremonies. We found Caroline online and she was perfect!! Having read about us a little here on my blog, she incorporated some recovery based prayer which was right on. I carried a copy of the St. Francis prayer in my shirt pocket next to my heart. It couldn’t have been better and more romantic.

Emily and I met a lot of people while on Kauai, and everyone reminded us that we were exactly where we were suppose to be. It seemed as if everywhere we went God was winking at us.

It’s amazing how life has turned out better then I could have ever dreamed of. God is doing for me what I could not do for myself. I am free.

Prayer of St. Francis:
“Lord, make me a channel of thy peace – that where there is hatred, I may bring love – that where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness – that where there is discord, I may bring harmony – that where there is error, I may bring truth – that where there is doubt, I may bring faith – that where there is despair, I may bring hope – that where there are shadows, I may bring light – that where there is sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted – to understand, than to be understood – to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to Eternal Life. Amen.”

I am free is a post from: How To Be Happy
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Last Thursday I went to the dentist for my 6 month cleaning. I used to really hate the dentist. Then I got into this sort of attitude where I felt I deserved any pain the dentist inflicted on me, that it was some how my punishment for not taking care of myself. I don’t feel that way now, I take care of me teeth and enjoy hearing praise on how clean I’m keeping my teeth.

Ok, sorry for the little rant on my history with the dentist… now to the topic of this post, “the little things.” What I’m talking about is how much more enjoyable life is when you have someone to enjoy life’s little things with.

You know the bag of “goodies” you get when leaving the dentist office? You know, the new toothbrush, the travel size toothpaste, dental floss, etc… Before I met my wonderful Emily, I would usually throw those away (or stick them in a drawer in my bathroom until I moved, then threw them away), I mean who needs “another” tooth brush and a travel size of toothpaste? Emily loves toothbrushes, she has one in almost every room in the house and most certainly every bathroom. She likes getting new ones, cool ones!! You know with the bendy heads and the ones that get into the “hard to reach” places. She also has a “thing” for toothpaste and at any given time has at least three brands in the master bath and several others throughout the various vanity’s around the house. So as I’m leaving the dentist office and walking down the steps to the parking lot, I lift up my bag of “goodies” in front of me for another look at the crap they just gave me, then I giggled and got excited inside. “Emily will think this is cool!!” I thought to myself, I even got some of those awesome little brushes for cleaning in between the teeth… she loves those! It’s right then I realized how COOL it is to share a life with someone who can teach you more about appreciating “the little things” and how to be happy with all of them.

Thanks Emily

The Little Things is a post from: How To Be Happy
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